Google’s EweTube Aimed at Farmers & Sheep

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CALIFORNIA—Google, the owner of YouTube released a version of their popular website last Friday. The new platform is aimed towards farmers and their sheep and cattle. “There’s a surprising market for this kind of thing,” says Sam Greer, a spokesman for the new company, “We already have a big advertising deal with Farmers Insurance.” We already have a big advertising deal with Farmers … Continue reading Google’s EweTube Aimed at Farmers & Sheep

Dog Owner Puzzled Why Dog is Winning Fitbit Challenge

Photo: This guy doesn’t need a Fitbit to win! AMHERST, NH- Recently, a man named Nico Jones-Douglas decided that it would be good idea to do the Fitbit challenge. He had been losing to his friends that did the challenge with him previously. “I was having trouble finding someone to do the challenge with me that I could actually beat. So I looked at [my dog] … Continue reading Dog Owner Puzzled Why Dog is Winning Fitbit Challenge

Apple Sued by Samsung for Patent Violation

Photo: The two phones moments before catching on fire, and lighting the wicker table they were brilliantly set on, then setting the whole apartment alight WASHINGTON, DC- The lawsuit from Apple Inc suing Samsung Electronics for stealing some of the iPhone’s design features was made even more complex after a batch of iPhone 7s started igniting. Samsung sued Apple for violating their patent on the Galaxy Note … Continue reading Apple Sued by Samsung for Patent Violation

Features of the New iPhone 7

Photo: Some of the new iPhone 7s, after the famous “steam-roller test” Apple recently released the new iPhone 7. Here are some of the advertised features. “It’s not a bug, it’s a feature.” -Tim Cook, CEO of Apple Is now manufactured by the same company that made the Treo Palm Now only supports Sprint 2G Buy the operating system separately Can only support apps made … Continue reading Features of the New iPhone 7

Popular Typing.com Sells Ads in Lessons

Photo: Teacher is having a hard time finding the ™ symbol for her student SEATTLE, WA- As students ask their teachers where the ™ symbol is on their keyboards, havoc breaks loose in the Typing.com advertising offices. Soon after the new update to the Typing.com website that added customizable keyboard keys, typo fixes and a new advertising system, a student came across the text she … Continue reading Popular Typing.com Sells Ads in Lessons

Apple uses Watch to Track Employees

Photo: An Apple Watch with a hidden tracking device inside CUPERTINO, CA- Outside of Apple Headquarters, a riot of employees, former employees and customers is raging. “It’s dishonest,” said a former employee. Apple has been using their news hit product, the Apple Watch, to track their employees. “I’ve always been mystified when I get phone calls from executives telling me not to get drunk when … Continue reading Apple uses Watch to Track Employees