What Is The Haystacks’ Sinister Purpose?

Photo: A field of haystacks at sunset. Pretty innocent looking, huh?

MARAMURES, ROMANIA- After many years, the extra terrestrial unit from the Romanian Government finally found the purpose of the many haystacks in their country’s fields. They discovered that the haystacks started off as a peaceful species. Then, in the late 14th century, extraterrestrials brought a virus from the gas planet known as 16Q7, and set it loose in the fields of earth’s nations. This infected the haystacks, causing them to react in an unnatural way. Haystacks began stealing needles from houses. They would then hoard them in their bristly build. In the early stages, the haystacks had trouble keeping the needles inside themselves without injuring their organs. The virus, having given them the ability to evolve quickly, made it easy for the haystacks to grow a thin but strong layer of dried grass that made it possible to hold up to 1,000 needles at a time.

The map below shows Sector 783g, the sector of haystacks that the unit observed for many years. This was an ideal secor, because of the diverse selection of haystacks. This sector has haystacks that are just developing, and are only 30 to 45 years old. It is also rich in midlife haystacks. There are also a handful of haystacks that have finished developing completely, and are the greatest threat to mankind.

KEY: Blue = Midlife, Red = Fully Developed, Green = Recent

Please share this article! For the sake of your Editor who spent 4 hours pouring over grainy satellite images of haystacks!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s